Guest Napper #55: SHHHH! I’m Shopping!

I just got back from Wegmans. At 9 a.m., the entire produce section was like a piranha feeding frenzy.

The olive bar resembled a game of Duck, Duck, Goose, with patrons circling the kalamatas like anxious predators.

Tense shoppers parked their carts in gridlocked spots around the cheese island, looking like they need a Valium more than a wheel of brie.

There were no chives. I will have to come up with another plan for garnishing my butternut squash soup.

I hope that Trent’s mom, Lizette, made a previous trip to Food Lion earlier in the week, because it looks as if she’s shopped this kid out and still has nothing in her cart.

You should have come earlier.

Okay, well, in Lizette’s defense, this isn’t really a photo from today. But it was really perfect for my mood. Which is not good. They have POLICE directing traffic AT THE GROCERY STORE, PEOPLE. How is this festive?

Now I’m home making beef stock, though, while my sainted husband steam vacuums our furniture. That’s putting the spirit of the holidays right back in my heart.

Be of good cheer, friends!

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